Meet The Urban Monk. I recommend his posts on the power of gratitude and on the Insult of False Kindness
Excerpt from False Kindness: Those were the words of someone, perhaps with kind intentions, but who had not been in her shoes; in fact, could not put himself in her shoes....Who can tolerate kindness like this? The people you help - they hold their tongue, they swallow their anger – for they need whatever you are offering. If they didn’t they might have shouted at you - who are you to come here with your smug advice, and your holier-than-thou attitude? .....his intentions were kind. But he lacked that understanding, he hadn’t climbed the mountain within.....Therein lies the insult. She becomes invisible – only his image of her, of what she should be, of what he should be like – only that mattered.
I'm not a Buddhist myself, although my husband is. I do find that Buddhist writings inform my Pagan practice to a very useful extent. Take what you need and leave the rest.
I hope to see more Pagan writers addressing issues such as forgiveness, compassion and gratitude as elements of Pagan practice. We practice these things every day - at least the Pagans I know do, and I hope that the ones you know do, too - but we do not teach enough about these issues in Circle or in the basic classes we offer to newcomers. Nor do we find much about this in Pagan books, even in the ones on ethics.